Well, I would just like to shove my big ole size 9.5 foot up the hoo-ha of anyone who doubts that Black women can land hot Korean men!!! TAKE THAT!!! Sorry, that wasn't directed at anyone in particular. OK, I have to be honest...I was one of those naysayers, too. I thought, "My God, Korea is where a Black woman's libido comes to shrivel up and die a slow, painful death..." But I actually had a really nice date tonight with a Korean guy named Bryan (his English name, of course). Bryan had emailed me to say hi on this website. He's 30, works as a civil engineer ("the people who build bridges and ports" as he described it...good thing because I was ready to Google it), and has a nice smile! I see lots of dentists in Korea and yet, some folks, even those living in very nice areas like Bucheon, don't seem to have adequate dental care. I don't get it, but that's not my business.
Anyway, he picked me up around 7pm. We just hung out around my town because there's plenty to do. We went to Pizza Hut for dinner, which is pretty expensive here actually so it wasn't a cheap date! I know what you're thinking..."Oh hell no he did NOT take her to Pizza Hut!!" But it's like $30 for a pizza and some pasta. Ridiculous. So after that, we went to a bar/lounge on my street. This just shows how LAME I've been for the past 6 months because there are some REALLY, REALLY cute, swanky bars right next door to me and I had NO idea. Loser. So we decided on one called People Bar. Good music and practically empty! AND, my favorite, no one was smoking! That never happens. So we really just talked...and it was nice to just TALK to someone. He seems really cool and he even helped me with my Korean. I told him I had all this homework from Korean class today and he went all through my bag to pull it out. He said, "Ok, I will help you. Let's study!" Yup, he's bold...but very helpful and I was appreciative. Lately, I've been feeling stuck with my Korean because I still don't know what people are saying to me! Written and spoken Korean are just totally different and it's irritating. I guess I felt the same way when I was learning Spanish, like an idiot. But now, I can understand most accents. Well, except Dominicans. Haha...anyway...
Going out on a real "date" with a Korean guy didn't feel as strange as I thought it would. I was so certain that I'd feel like a freak show with people just staring and pointing. Four years ago when I was living and studying in Mexico, I dated a Mexican guy. We had a great time together, but we attracted A LOT of aggression when we went out together. Mostly from old people who openly frowned and shouted at our presence. So, you can't be surprised when I thought Bryan and I would be denied service or something, Civil Rights style. But it didn't happen. And I am normally level-headed but I kept trying (stupidly) to pry something "prejudiced" out of him. Setting a racial mousetrap and taunting him as if to say, "Come on, you know you want to call me a monkey or something!!!" I grilled him, asking questions like, "So, why did you REALLY email me? Did it bother you that I was Black? I mean, did you think I was easy or something???!"
OH, HELLO, PARANOIA!! YOUR STRAIT JACKET IS WAITING!!!!!
He just laughed and said, "Umm, well I emailed you because you looked nice. I liked your smile and your face. No, it didn't bother me that you were Black. Why would it? Easy? What does this mean?" And by that point, I just let it go. That conversation could have gone from 0 to "WOW YOU'RE CRAZY" had I explained what "easy" meant. So I realized that I was searching for something that wasn't there and that probably wasn't going to materialize (at least not at Pizza Hut). Even though some folks may be prejudiced, I can't paint all Koreans with the same brush here. Bryan was genuinely interested in me and I don't know why my brain didn't want to acknowledge it. My mind just couldn't grasp this concept that an attractive Korean guy would willingly go out with me, a Black woman, when there are plenty of attractive Korean women for the taking. You know, one of his own. Call it what you'd like but that's how I was feeling. Sort of a stunned shock when he actually DID show up. I was kinda expecting him to back out at the last minute or for the cameras to jump out and say, "GOTCHA!!!" I think I'm pretty but being out here for only 6 months has a way of making one (a Black one, I should say) feel............hmmmm. Feel.....unappreciated. Yes, that's it.
But I'm working on it...this "appreciation" thing. I think there are plenty of Korean guys interested in brown women. They just don't always speak up! But there'll be lots more talking because I have another date tomorrow. With Jason.