**pregaming before Gangnam** Holding my newest baby...
I miss gumbo. When's the last time you ate some? My mom makes really great gumbo but she hasn't made it in years. Anyway, this is my weekend gumbo - a total hodgepodge of random happenings.
I'm so proud of my last post!! So much love and laughter poureth from my readers! :) I was actually gonna write that many, many months from now but then I guess the details wouldn't have been so fresh.
Anywho, another random ass weekend. On Saturday night, I went out to Gangnam for partying. It's a popular area here in Korea, lots of young folks acting a fool. And hey, look at that, I fit RIGHT IN! My friend got lots of good video of the foolishness, too. I will attempt to add it but my technology skills are pretty low. And by low of course, I mean non-existent. I had a great time though. We bumped into a guy who we'd seen the weekend before out in Hongdae. So random...different club, same hot guy. But my feelings got hurt when he stood up. His theme song should've been "Dancing Queen" as he was clearly only interested in men. Waaaaaaaay too much hip action for a straight, non-West Indian man! You know only those Caribbean men get the free pass to shake it like that! DAH WELL!
Quite frankly, I'm still a little bitter that my Robert's gone. As I rolled in around 6am, I checked my email like a good crackhead and there it was- a long email from him. With pictures! And guess what fool started crying all over again??! This is why alcohol isn't my friend. But at least I'm not drunk texting anymore. Nothing good ever comes from that. But I feel for him - said he's the odd man out and no one wants to "play" with him. Hahaha...play takes on a whole different connotation after age 8, but I chalked it up to him not knowing any better. I made it a point to mention that maybe, he should've studied in the US! Lots of playmates there...like yours truly :)
Men in hoodies will ALWAYS do things for me...always...
Well, let's see what else? Hmmm, I think I may have a semi-stalker. Or maybe you can decide if this is creepy or cute...I guess if you have to ask, it's probably just creepy huh? But for S's & G's, let's ruminate a little...last weekend as I was headed to Korean class (yes, I'm still suffering through it), this guy stopped me in the train station asking if I did tutoring. I said sure...whatever. Gave him my number, told him to call me. But I didn't mean 20 mins later. And I don't care how cute a guy is, a girl NEVER wants to hear from him 20 minutes after she gives him her number. Unless you are Blair Underwood. Then it is okay. But since this was for lessons, I thought fine. He wanted to meet that day and I said you're crazy. Can't do it. So finally, we had lunch this past Sunday. At 11:30am!! Who in the HELL eats lunch at 11:30?! And at TGI Friday's no less! We were the only ones in there for a good hour. So, his name is David and he's a freaking English teacher!! Are you...are you serious....?? This has quickly become a pet peeve of mine here in Korea. It has happened twice now where guys approach me under the guise of needing to "improve" their perfect English when they really want a date. Don't do that...
So, we had great conversation actually, talking about the flawed Korean education system that force feeds children English and why my middle schoolers are comatose. Talked about the US beef scandal here in Korea, which is always a fun topic. *eye roll* I lamented how much I missed eating good salads here in Korea, which is true. I meant to eat one back in February when I was home but hamburgers got in the way. So, turns out he didn't want lessons but rather conversation. He said he can speak English (duh) but when it comes to talking about "deeper" things like politics and controversial issues, he finds himself stuck. So, he proposed this - since I only have 3 months left, he would show me around Korea every Sunday and pay for everything and we'd just talk. I'm thinking, "Wow, this sure sounds a lot like dating where I come from..." After parting ways, he called me 20 mins later once again.
HIM: Oh, hi Joia. (REALLY? "Oh hi" like I didn't just see you 20 mins ago? Ok then...)
ME: Yeah, hi. What's up?
HIM: Joia, I lost my words at the restaurant...
ME: Hm, ok. Did you, uh, find them yet?
HIM: *laughs* Yes. I have them now...
ME: Alright. Well, that's great!!
HIM: I just wanted to say...you looked really gorgeous at lunch.
ME: *nervous laughing* Thaaaaaanks... *throat clearing, paper shuffling, palpable awkwardness*
HIM: Ok, well...see you next time.
ME: Yup! Have a great day!
Later that evening, he was blowing up my phone. Called me about 3 times in a row. I didn't answer it because I was hanging out with Scott (more on that later). So I finally answered it and he said he had a present for me. He had been out shopping at the market and bought some stuff for me. A whole range of thoughts went through my head, some quite gruesome. I called my friend who lives in my building and told her to come with me to meet him. And I definitely wasn't bringing him near my apartment...hell no. I met him a good 5 minute walk away and he was holding a big shopping bag. I thought he was gonna reach in and take out my present, but no, it was the entire bag. He'd bought me stuff for a salad - lettuce, dressing, and a bunch of fruit that I would never put in a salad. It was a nice thought but still - is it creepy or cute? What say you, readers??
Ahhhh....Scott. That's not a refreshing-I-just-opened-a-Sprite-can ahhhh. That's an exasperated damn-I-don't-wanna-play-Guesstures-anymore ahhhh. We hung out for about 4 hours and I could tell you everything we talked about in 5 words - music, exercise, food, exercise, and music. Ok, that's 3. Since I didn't know what he was saying most of the time, our conversation was fraught with my artificial laughter. Little sunkissed bursts of fakeness. "Sure, that sounds like a funny word...laugh now!" And then there's my classic puzzled expression which worked quite well. I think I've perfected it. I didn't know this phoniness existed within me but oh it does! I imagined myself ripped from the pages of some stuffy fundraising banquet, hobnobbing with important people. Sans the requisite wine glass in hand. Scott, daaaaaaaaahling! He's nice I guess but I think we're better as work out buddies. He has the two big problems that are non-negotiable for me - crusty, chapped, painfully dry lips and smoking. Just no. No, no, no. I could write an entire post of No's about this. Nothing says "please, don't kiss me" quite like those 2 things. And I'm also baffled by the fact that he's a personal trainer that smokes! He went through all my food in my kitchen looking at the labels and telling me how bad it is for me...and yet, he smokes! Anytime I'd try to suggest something to eat, he'd point at his stomach and say, "No. Very fat." Well, damnit, you have a pack of Marlboros in your pocket!!! Hypocrisy at its best. So, I'm afraid Scott will go the way of the Wooly Mammoth and Do-do bird. But he's still nice eye candy at the gym...
Here's a video of me and my friend in Gangnam. There is some foul language so maybe not a good idea at work. The unconscious man threw up all over his friend...and his friend knocked him the HELL out. So they're trying to revive him. Police are really just a decoration here because they were just chit chattin' and laughing it up. Um, can this man get an ambulance or a hospital? I dunno, just asking. THEN, the man in the corner threw up on himself and right around 2:45 on the video, he wakes up and stumbles his @$$ on down the street. I love Korea.
Korean vatos??? Who knew?!